Everything we run away from has power over us; everything we go through, we conquer.
The above quote/thought/whatever you want to call it, is the theme of my day.
Last night I discussed with you how my depression and anxiety affects me at times. This morning God revealed to me that the reason this happens to me. The reason that I become someone else’s because of what I call torment that I experienced growing up. I behave in a way around others, or react in a way that is not who I truly am or want to be because I don’t want to get harassed, get into a fight, be bullied etc.. by people.
What a revelation! Embarrassing, but still a breakthrough.
Tonight after dealing with a stressful family situation, I cried and wanted to just get out. Run away. Give up. Then I was led by God to another revelation- perseverance and don’t give Satan the power. Don’t give Satan your family. Satan is trying to destroy my family and me. He wants me to be weak as I was before. To stop seeking God. To not be a testimony to my family. If I want my family to find God then I need to trust in God to give me strength and perseverance and patience and understanding and peace. If I want to be strong in my faith and walk and not carry the chains of guilt any longer which at times resembles Jacob Marley’s chains in A Christmas Carol, then I need to keep praying when it gets tough. When Satan uses my family to drag me down. When Satan uses my past and my depression and anxiety to drag me down.
Seek God. Seek ye first the kingdom of God.
God bless you all.